Thursday, January 5, 2012
My mind has been racing the last few days since I started blogging. It is just days away from my last semester of school. I am not sure if I am ready for that anxiety again. I am tired of being broke and at the same time I am totally a wreck about what I am going to do after I graduate. I would love to home school my kids, work from home, work on my hobbies, start taxidermy, and move somewhere so I can be outdoors all day. How great would it be if you were a kid that gets to have their school lessons outside, on a trail, or in the back yard??? Unfortunately no job means no money and being stuck on this corner lot. To de-stress I would usually go to the lake because there is so many possibilities. I would actually consider going hunting today if it wasn't for the drive to the land (that we don't own) and the walk from the barbed wire fence to the stand because I don't have a four wheeler and the fact that I can't buy the gas for the car or the four wheeler. I am ready for some changes in my life, I pray something comes for me. Because of the on again anxiety, I am having some crazy dreams. Some make no sense and some I wish I could make happen. I obsessively look at overpriced houses on the market just to look at them. Last night I had a dream about this house in Amity that would be amazing to have. The house had a swimming pool that overlooks the pond/lake in the backyard. In my dream I was tanning in the pool with the girls and our horses all jumped in to swim with us. HA so crazy. Another dream I had was that blogging allowed me to get free products from my favorite hunting/outdoors stores. It was so much fun I just wanted to go back to sleep!! The dream probably would have got better but I woke when Colt was leaving at 5:00 this morning for his first job of the year. That in itself is a blessing but hopefully my fortune cookie has something in store for me...not just Colt finally getting work.